Two things I struggle with every day

But I think I may have found the answer

Girl looking out over city at sunset
Photo by Jeffrey Erhunse on Unsplash

The other evening I was in bed with my iPad in front of me.  If I take it to bed with me when I go at 6pm, which is not often, it’s because I’m playing a game or listening to my audio book, or more often than not both.  This is my downtime.  

Suddenly I felt the urge to write.  This is what I wrote.  I have not touched it since I wrote it, which means it has not been edited at all, so please forgive typos etc.

‘I do my best work at night.  At least I would do.  I am writing this at 8.30 pm but I know that my body will shut down. I will be eating supper soon then my body will say that’s it for your day, I’m stopping now.  We’re eating a bit later tonight, which is how I’m managing write this. Normally it’s 7.30.  I have my iPad in front of me again, unusual. My brain whirs but I can’t do the work. Hence when I’m tired in the mornings all the ideas have gone’

I knew I didn’t have much time, because supper was looming but it’s what came flowing out of my head at that particular moment.

I am showing you this (when I would normally delete it in disgust!) because it suddenly gave me an insight into my world.  By this I mean it showed me a good reason why I procrastinate so much.

Because of my disability I have an absolutely relentless daily routine which never varies ( . This means I have six or seven hours during the day to do things. Since lockdown those hours have been all mine. At first I quite enjoyed the extra time and vowed I would use it to practice my writing skills, do some marketing, do more reading.

Well, I have read a lot about blogging and a lot about marketing.  I have read other blogs, and newsletters, and I’ve read my book.  But the only writing I did was to comment on blog posts.   Major procrastination set in. Again.  

A ‘Eureka’ moment

After I had the urgent need to write something in bed, it suddenly occurred to me that, of course, I was organising my days the wrong way round.  I use the hours in the day to draft and publish my blog posts. What I should be doing, of course, is writing when I go to bed which is when all my best ideas come. If my body is too tired I could dictate ideas to my phone.

Then I can take time the next day to read my draft, edit it and all the other things you have to do, and then publish the day after.

That way I can spend the daytime under less pressure. I can read as many articles as I want, learn marketing, take a break at lunchtime, instead of looking at a blank page and not being able to think of a single word to put on it, or, even worse, racing against time to publish before bedtime.

I need to write more, I’m desperate to write more. Maybe changing things round to write at my best time of day will help me.

My Second Struggle

The second thing I struggle with is a writing space.  I don’t have one.  I live in a small house with a living room and kitchen, and two bedrooms and a bathroom. I have one bedroom, Mr. C has the other, so we have no spare space.   I have no personal space.

 I can’t write in my bedroom because it is so full of medical equipment and storage for my meds and other things related to my disability, there simply is no room. 

I could write in the kitchen, and I do, but it’s not my space, it’s Mr C’s space since he does all the cooking, washing and other kitchen related things.

So I write in the living room, which is light and airy, a pleasant space. But it’s not a personal space.

Not having a personal space usually means I am constantly interrupted and distracted.  

In his book ‘On Writing’ Stephen King says:

‘take your story through at least two drafts; the one you do with the study door closed and the one you do with it open. With the door shut, downloading what’s in my head directly to the page, I write as fast as I can and still remain comfortable’.

Stephen King – On Writing

To me, that’s a perfect description of how I feel writing in bed. I cannot imagine why I have never thought of this before since I spend more time in bed than I do in my chair.

Because we are conditioned from a very young age to regard ‘bedtime’ as the end of our day I think I regard going to bed at 6pm as the end of my day. But why should it be? I could write for a couple of hours then settle down for a normal evening, eating and watching tv.

So, another reason to blog after I’m in bed, hopefully, longer without interruption.  And I can shut the door!

Unmade bed with notebook saying a little space to be creative
Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash



    Belle….even my mind is creatively active in the night. I can feel you. As you said, you can brief the ideas to phone and draft the blog posts in the day. Also, you can utilise the outdoor seating (if you have) otherwise make some space in bedroom and you can write there.

    I hope you are doing well. Please do take care.

  • glenmckenzie(justabitfurther)

    That’s a great point about the first being more of a “brain dump” and then getting it polished in the second draft. I’ve been in a bit of a writing funk lately for a number of reasons. Maybe I need to get back to just writing what is in my head and not looking for perfection the first go around.

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